Used to be

we sit side by side crisscross applesauce at the back of the room

i used to be a romantic she says as the smoke curls around her head

dead hearted

hollow chested

echoing words

listening quietly i try not to swat at the smoke

understanding that this feeling that she is feeling just needs time and healing

i join her in her darkness with my tiny light

hold my hand i say

don’t start that goofy holistic shit says my dead hearted friend

this makes me laugh and she half smiles

hand still outstretched

she takes it

tears stream down her face as she ashes into the potted plants

holding hands we sit side by side crisscross applesauce at the back of the room