death of a queen/ seat of consciousness

dear warrior queen,

meet us at the edge of darkness and the rim of light.

divided for too long we have been.

love,

i am + sister nature

I woke up to this letter pinned to the breastplate of my rose gold armor.

My heart always opens for them – I mean they are who I have been fighting for all these years… Right?

Dawning on me like the morning sun I realize that I am enslaved to this ”fight”

And if I am not free… then neither are they

So to free me is to free she because we are a we

Hmmm…

I denounce the crown and throw my selenite sword into the lake of fire

Back to the hell, it came from

I am willing to do anything to free us

War-torn

Forlorn and sensitive

This is no way to live or die

I walk back through the forest of forever

Dropping my armor as I go

Shaking this load off

I am headed to meet my selves at the rim of light, the edge of darkness

I hear them singing as I approach

Ahhhh, we’ve been waiting for you my love she says as sister nature nods -We saved you a seat…

to be continued…

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Rusty Simplicity

The rusty metal of the hanger seemed to beg for embellishment or at least that’s what I told myself.

Faux flowers

Green wire

Strong shears

I cut, wrap, and rework, remembering how my mom used to make wreaths for holidays and as gifts.

Moments like this one connect me to her in a positive way. I laugh to myself and thank God for the opportunity to see her from a different perspective, past, and present.

Faux flowers

Green wire

Strong shears

ego will invoice ya

I wrote this poem below a few weeks ago after a young man talked to me quite recklessly. I save my energy these days choosing peaceful silence and a pen. I took an L that day honestly. The lesson for me was to value all of who I am and who I am not. In doing that it will become easier to identify and attract higher vibrations. Instead of taking the anger I felt and making a poor choice I turned it into the verses you see below then I let it go. I remember that my feelings, negative or positive, are fuel. Vroom Vroom – *pulls off

As long as I got the Pontiac

My plug ain’t walking

Watch all that sh*t you talking

No more hot boxin’ in Acuras

Gold fangs call me Dracula

On my peaceful sh*t not attacking ya

But I’m still human so watch that mouth or I’m slapping ya

Don’t touch me with that energy

I’m not feeling it

Imma have to invoice ya if you want me healin’ it

Ain’t sh*t free

Brotha you gonna have to pay me

You seem saltier then a saltine

At all this queenly femininity

Serving dope vibes all through YO City

Sitting pretty like a titty

Connected and protected

Growing stronger even when disrespected

I am

I am

I am

3:33 am listening to Aquemini

(if you can: read, hit the link, listen, read some more and repeat)

I am not the cause of anyone’s unhappiness only my own.

What a relief. Kind of.

I stare into the eyes of my unhappiness the unhappiness I am experiencing and put my hand on my heart space.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/synthesizer/266365274?i=266365443

”The fuck is this?” I think offended by my own thoughts.

My ego, *big sigh, taking offense, finding fault and being reactive per usual.

I have fought a lot of egos, to include my own, repeatedly, but nobody ever wins.

Nobody.

And I don’t have any fight left in me.

*Laughs

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/aquemini/266365274?i=266365360

My heart reminds me to offer myself some compassion and my spirit rings with the teachings of Tolle and Ruth.

The activated vibration of the love God created me with is shaking loose more and more of what no longer serves me…

It is uncomfortable though…

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/hold-on-be-strong/266365274?i=266365277

*Hold on be strong

Hold on be strong

Hold on be strong

Hold on be strong

(Aquemini ‘till I die *puts fist up)

I know this suffering is leading me somewhere…

Let’s go I tell my self and the ego.

Hand in hand we stand up and face the roaring negativity within me exposing it to the light of awareness.

It burns.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/da-art-of-storytellin-pt-2/266365274?i=266365473

I close my eyes and feel the unhappiness, the pain, the fear, the anger, the anxiety…

Lean in.

Go through it.

Grow through it.

Aquemini continues to play as my emotions burn away.

*Damn, Damn, Damn, James.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/spottieottiedopaliscious/266365274?i=266365523

Observe the thoughts.

Observe the feelings.

Just keep breathing.

No reaction.

18 years of sadness, that’s a long ass time.

Umpteen years of fear, that’s a long ass time.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/yall-scared/266365274?i=266365536

No more years of tears, fears, or sadness.

It doesn’t matter how it started, who created it or where it came from, in this present moment I detach from it.

All of it.

”Depart from me!” I yell dramatically with a smile.

I believe the sadness is lifting and my consciousness is shifting.

I am my own Harriet T. getting my mind free.

Lifting and shifting in the darkness of night led by the light.

I make a vow to love me truly, especially at 3:33 when self-created demons scratch at my soul and try to tell me that I am not whole.

Lifting and shifting to freedom- I am.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/liberation/266365274?i=266365542

I love you woman that I’m still getting to know- till death do us part -even when you fart.

Laughs -hard

I am the effect of my own awareness.

*Shake that load off, Shake that load off

Shake that load off, Shake that load off

Shake that load off, Shake that load off

Writer’s Note: Thank you: André Benjamin, Antwan Patton, Erica Wright, George Clinton, David Sheats, Y Pickens, Cameron Gipp, Willie Knighton Jr., Erin Johnson, Masada Hogans, Robert T. Barnett, Joi Gilliam, Myrna Crenshaw, Ruben Bailey, CeeLo Green, Frederick Bell, Jamahr Williams, Patrick Brown, Organized Noize, and Thomas Burton. Thank you for creating. Your words, melodies, and voices kept the lights on in my heart as I realized and removed the dark that almost snuffed out my spark. Angels y’all are- fly as fuck.

Thank you too, for listening to the me that is I, she, and we.

* = Lyrics by OutKast

Give Me Strength

Dimensions dimensions grow with our intentions intentions

The warrior Queen took a knee in the forest of forever

Images of children wounded by systems that didn’t understand them plagued her mind

She took a deep breathe and touched the golden mustard seed she wore around her neck as a reminder of the Creator’s promise

Standing up in strength in the forest of forever the archangels covered her in faith

She headed back into battle

Built for this she was

Dimensions dimensions grow with our intentions intentions



The stars and God

He was God sent.

Aware of her imperfections, he could never place her on a pedestal because she was too beautifully human to be pressured with perfection.

Laughing at her mad face he squeezed her anxiety away with a tight hug. She just wanted some quality attention and in spite of her words, he knew her intentions. They showed in her actions.

He reminded her to put herself first and never missed an opportunity to thank her for being herself especially as she quietly cared for others with love in her heart.

She was far from perfect, full of passion, and sometimes not very patient. But he knew what he knew and he felt what he felt; she was God sent too.