my Rich homie

My rich homie lets me borrow his Beamer sometimes.

“Put it in Sport mode,” he says.

I never have.

I glide down highways slowly.

He works a lot,

and we all wish we saw him more—

I wish he saw himself more.

I’ve known him a long time.

Pretty much,

he’s always been rich—

though he doesn’t see it that way.

If he fucks with you,

he’ll tell you the hard truth

about anything you ask.

With me,

sometimes it’s unsolicited.

Our other homie once repeated

something he said

about me

and my job at the time:

“They don’t value her—

and she needs to value herself more.”

That was the gist.

I was pissed.

So pissed.

Then I sat with it.

Picked apart all the reasons

I was upset.

And it was true.

The time had come

for me to reassess

my value.

My rich homie’s truth

can triple salaries.

I’ve seen it.

Makes me believe

even more

that wealth

is internal.

There’s nuance, though.

Always.

Is wealth something

given by God?

Is it our birthright?

Where does it start?

Can you build it?

Or are you

just making visible

what already existed

for you?

What is wealth?

Is it time?

Is it money?

Is it people?

Is it time

to spend the money

with the people?

What is wealth?

What is rich?

Is it a feeling?

Is it worth it?

I’m most certainly

still figuring wealth

and riches out—

and I think

I always will be.

What I do know

is gratitude

makes me feel wealthy.

Thank you, my God.

Thank you.

My rich homie

lets me borrow his Beamer sometimes.

“Put it in Sport mode,” he says.

And maybe,

I will

next time.

Just for July

Good grief—it’s already July?

Have your dreams been as vivid as mine?

Are you remembering what you thought you forgot?

Are you nurturing those unhinged parts of yourself that need love and attention just like the rest of you?

Are you staying open?

Are you letting go?

Are you?

Yeah. It’s already July—sheesh, and good grief.

Processing good grief.

Vivid dreams, whose meanings rarely elude me, tell stories of what is, what was, and what could be.

Sometimes I remember—and then I forget again.

And it’s okay to remember and to forget.

Oh, those unhinged parts—

I let them swing sideways in the winds of my love

As I view them from perspectives that heal and realign.

It’s okay, remember?

You’re okay, remember?

I whisper this to those unhinged parts,

And slowly, they realign in divine time.

I’m staying open—as much as I can.

It makes the letting go easier.

I am.

Good grief—it’s already July.

Let’s March- slowly tho

Dark and light

Awake in the quiet minutes to midnight on the eve of March second

All is what is

February my love – thank you

Light and dark

Value and tone

Rinsed brushes – working late nights and early mornings

Shushing babies and challenging them to listen during the day – distractions be damned we can focus little loves- and we do

Watching the sky’s changing colors as the sun sets i whisper all the reasons i am grateful – especially on the draining days

Hasheesh warns against burnout and suggests finding balance

Done

Dark and light

All is what it is

Well hello February

Silences pervades as love persists

Embracing change is imperative

Change exists within daily patterns –

The ability to discern the nuances of the mundane

Perceiving the pattern and evolving it – even slightly

Feeding the love we have been blessed with

The chance to breathe in another season

Gratitude grows in the pervading silence

Change is evolution

Change is growth

Life -life is change

Speed and pace don’t mean too much as rhythm reigns supreme

Silences pervades as love persists…

Photos all my own.

Divine Mama

She wakes me up to draw her

So she can pray

For me

For we

Divine mothers appear at every turn

Teaching me

Leading me

Learned God is a black woman

Praying more fervently now

It all makes sense

And then it doesn’t again

Two headed not two faced

Hearing the words they don’t say

Seeing the pain and the peace they don’t display

Don’t try to hide it I’ll see it anyway

She wakes me up to draw her

So she can pray

for me

for we

Divine mothers appear at every turn

Soul Shares:

https://dcs.megaphone.fm/CAD7333497420.mp3?key=e5dfdae458a46d25d1abebf7dde12c5b

https://music.apple.com/us/album/get-free/1453748262?i=1453748439

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=AP73UWf0FE4

Art: Charcoal on paper – Tiffany Nicole

where’s my lighter?

 

The queen burned down her own kingdom 

Overrun with foolishness

She was homeless

Far from hopeless though

She laughed slightly and smiled 

The queen burned down her own kingdom

 She stood just close enough to feel the warmth of the flickering flames and not get burnt

Bending down, she lit her cigarette on the walls of her burning kingdom 

Unafraid of cancer, because we’re all terminal anyway, she inhaled and exhaled 

Fuck it

Let it burn

Let it burn

Let it burn 

She owned that it wasn’t built on anything worth saving 

Foundation fractaled by faux “I’ll love you forevers” flung from mouths that made mockeries of marriage 

Unions made useless 

Committed only to not being committed 

Lessons learned

Bridges burned 

The queen burned down her own kingdom

Let it Burn

to be continued…

Turtle power

My feet dangle off the side of the slightly wet footbridge. Large lush leaves in every hue of green gently sway in the lightly blowing winds. My ears enjoy the symphony of bird songs. Here I am taking a moment to stop along the path per usual. My turtle friend swims by reminding me to slow down, take my time, and be here now.

Slow down mind.
Slow down time.

Royal Palm

[found this in an email to myself from 2014]

She rode thru old spaces
Thinking of all those places
The words that fell from faces
Their weight had held her down
Horrified that she would drown
She now realized that  fight she fought
And the fucked up shit it brought
Those actions were the offspring of fear
Amanayea came with the light & made it clear
Fear is Darkness meddling in your mind
Awakened to Truth she put fear’s ass in line
She refused to focus on the fuckedupness of life
the constant replaying of perceived strife
She rode thru old spaces
Thinking of all those places
The words that fell from faces
They were never holding her down-
They were building her up so she could wear the crown

You have Time Woman

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Time tells tales of strength and weakness

Eternal longevity

Tick-tocking seconds and minutes fall off clocks that aren’t real

Time tells tales of love and loss at zero costs

Eras and periods constantly give way to new days, infinitely wrapping around the neck of forever like the perfect pashmina

Time tells tales of legends and myths sailing by on ships of selfless and selfish acts

Dancing in storms of self-created anguish and angst and passion and pleasure

Wonder women and wandering women finding their way through time

Time tells tales and I am here to listen with my infinite ear